I started working here in the Spring of 2006. I hadn�t moved around much and had managed to accumulate twenty years at my previous place. Although no high flyer, my clerking job in payroll had been enough to secure a nice redundancy payoff when the axe finally fell.

This job suits me fine. I collect and report on weekly figures, progress schedules and the like. They regard me as a safe pair of hands and I guess I�m fairly popular around the place. I get to move around the office a bit and know almost everyone, at least by sight.

There is another strong attraction to working here. Some of the girls are just to die for!

I�m not much of a talker. Being into watching girls pee, tends to make one a little shy around women, especially when their close presence is sending uncontrollable hormones coursing through the veins. It�s quite a skill trying to disguise arousal, keeping an appearance of easy normality when your brain is mentally picturing a private moment for the person standing in front of you.

Since being very small, my most intense fantasies have demanded concealment. If I can see what I�m not allowed to see, without the girl knowing I�m there, I�m in heaven.

Inevitably I find myself constantly looking for opportunities, but of course they are so hard to find. Perhaps that intensifies the pleasure. I often wonder whether if I had unlimited access to ladies toilets, I would start to become bored by it. I�ll never know. I feel destined for interminable frustration.

There was certainly no chance at work. One night I stayed late, after everyone had gone, and looked inside the ladies. My adrenalin tap was turned full on as I went from cubicle to cubicle, just breathing in the ambience and looking at the loo seats where so many of the gorgeous girls I worked alongside must have placed their naked bottoms. But as for looking for places to hide, there was no chance.
The ceiling was a lightweight suspended grid. No way would it take my weight even if I could somehow get inside it. The walls were solid painted plaster and tile and the only way to do it would be to sneak into a cubicle and wait.
Believe me that crossed my mind. When you�re driven by that unsatisfied urge you can lose a sense of reality and start to take risks. Fortunately my self control has sustained and I have never succumbed to a temptation where the risk is unjustifiable. I�ve just learned to live with it.

One day however, I did have an opportunity that withstood my test of risk assessment.

Every last Thursday in the month we had a night out after work. There were a few regulars while others would attend occasionally. On this particular night we were having a drink after ten pin bowling. I was quite friendly with a girl called Lynne. She was no looker, in fact she was pretty plain, and made no attempt to dress smartly or look after her hair or skin. She was fairly shy but I think she recognised the same in me and so we both felt comfortable with each other�s company.
There was a fair degree of empathy between us and I never felt threatened or intimated around her.

Over a number of months I suppose I had opened up to Lynne a bit, nothing too close but she knew a bit about me and always took the time to talk. There was a complete absence of mutual attraction, and somehow this was silently acknowledged.

On that particular night, my attention was distracted by the presence of Lisa, who didn�t usually join in the socials. It was easy to be distracted by Lisa. She was twenty two, straight blonde hair, parted to the left and curving down to her shoulders in a neat stylish cut. Her face was perfect, with clear skin, almond shaped green eyes, framed by film star cheekbones and cupid mouth.
She was about 5ft 7 but seemed taller as her long legs in tight blue jeans seemed to accentuate her shape, especially on the red and black heels she�d put back on after the bowling. She wore a soft salmon pink wool top and her fantastic bust was pushing open the weave to show a hint of black bra beneath. I was obsessed.

I was obviously failing to hide my distraction as I became aware of Lynne asking me if I�d heard what she�d just said. I hadn�t.
�For God sake Rob will you stop staring at her. She�s far too young for you and I�m not sure your thoughts are very healthy�.
She was teasing me, obviously understanding the affect Lisa was having.
�Sorry sorry� I muttered, �honestly I�m sorry, I shouldn�t be looking�.
�Its only natural� said Lynne, �don�t worry about it, I�m not offended. In fact it�s quite interesting�.
�Interesting?� I replied, �In what way interesting?� I was curious about how I was being perceived.
�I�m just wondering what gets you going. Is it legs, tits, face? What do you like about her?�

This was a departure from our normal level of conversation, and to be honest I was a bit reticent about sharing it.
�Come on Rob you can trust me. You�re a bit of an open book, I�m just trying to read it in the right order� She was determined to take this further.
�I don�t think the book is as open as you might think� I stammered, already going farther than I was comfortable with.
�Aha� said Lynne, the water is deeper than it looks�.
�I think the metaphors are getting a bit mixed up Lynne. I could just fancy the arse off her right, and I think everyone else in here would say the same�.
I was trying to curtail her enthusiasm for tapping into my psyche, but she wouldn�t be deterred.
�Would you just want to shag her, or is it kinkier than that?� She was smiling, and I smiled back. As I said, she was non-threatening and I began to relax a bit.

Just at that moment Lisa put her bottle down on the bar and walked towards the ladies, her little waist a centre of gravity, and her bottom moving sexily beneath her jeans.
As she pushed open the door, I gave a tiny but audible exclamation.

�I bet you�re wondering what she�s doing in there� teased Lynne, relentlessly.
�Well actually, you�ve got it in one, I�d just give anything to see her pee on the toilet� - What was I saying?!
�Bloody hell!� gasped Lynne swallowing her mouthful of cider rather too quickly. �I supposed I asked for that!�
�Are you shocked?� I asked, strangely relieved that the tension was lifted.
�Yeah I guess so, but hey if it turns you on, it turns you on, we all have our little fantasies that no-one knows about�.
�Not so little actually. It�s always been a big one for me�. I was opening up, sensing that she wasn�t about to judge me harshly and walk away.

We talked some more, with me revealing a lot about the sensuous pleasure of watching girls pee, allied to the electric thrill of witnessing something intimately private.
Lynne theorised about how my fetish might have started. I couldn�t confirm any of her ideas though.

As the evening drew to a close we left together, and shared a taxi part of the way home. We had become a little closer and the friendship easily survived my indiscretion.

About two weeks later, Lynne e mailed me to say she had to nip into town at lunchtime and did I fancy a coffee? A bit unusual, but given our new level of intimacy, I was quite happy to meet up. We arranged to meet in a place she knew, at twelve thirty.

Lynne was already there when I arrived. I bought an Americano and took a seat in the alcove alongside her.
�How�s tricks?� I started.
�Come and sit down, I�ve got an idea you might like�. She was speaking quietly. I listened.
�I�ve been working with Maureen in comps this past week, and we�ve been talking. The conversation got round to Lisa. She knows her quite well.
�Well apparently Lisa had mentioned to her that she was really worried as she�s short of cash and needs to pay off some debt she�s got herself into. Then Maureen had said in a joke throw away line that she would have to sell her body or something�.
Where was this going? I wondered to myself.
Lynne continued �I asked her how much did she owe and Maureen said she thought it was quite a bit. Then I said something I maybe shouldn�t have, - but I did anyway�.

I felt suddenly angry at where I thought this was leading, but at the same time my stomach flipped and I had to hear more.
I held my hands to my head and anxiously asked Lynne what the hell had she done?

�I said to Maureen that I had a friend who would certainly be a buyer in that shop�. - More bloody metaphors!
�I made it sound like a joke, as if there was no way it was meant to be taken seriously. But she wanted to know more. I just said that there was a guy I know who was a bit infatuated; there was no way I�d give her any clues about who I was talking about�
I was mortified, but intrigued nevertheless.

�Anyway� Lynne carried on, �this morning Maureen reminded me of the conversation and wanted to know more. She said she�d been out with Lisa at the weekend and our little chat had come up in the course of conversation. Lisa had asked her to find out if I�d been in any way serious�.
This was heading in exactly the direction I thought it might have been and I was starting to become light headed.
�Look Rob, I had to tell her more at that point�.
�What did you say?�
�I told her that it wasn�t exactly about sex. That I had a good friend who had a fetish for watching girls piss, and that he just might be prepared to pay to watch her mate�.
�Oh. My. God� I breathed helplessly.
�She said she�d get back to me�.
�And?� I asked, as she paused a little too long.
�She just did and she said maybe. She wants to know more�.

My head was reeling, I didn�t know whether this was an act of friendship or betrayal. I acted angry, drank my coffee down, stood up and left the cafe.

I made my way back to work, dreading bumping into either Maureen or Lisa, but of course that�s exactly what I did do. Even though they had no idea it was me Lynne had talked about, I felt a burning embarrassment, and my face reddened as we passed in the corridor. It wouldn�t have surprised me if they had identified me there and then just from the colour of my cheeks.

I tried to forget it but of course there was no chance of that and every time I saw Lisa glide across the office my mind just thought, - �what if?�

The pressure built up and I found myself drafting an e mail to Lynne, asking to �talk more about you know what�.
My finger hovered over the return key, hesitating��.then I pressed �send�.

I met up with Lynne in a suitably obscure bar after work. The last thing I wanted was either of those two seeing us together.
�What do you think?� I began.
�Well Maureen had wanted to know how our conversation had gone� she replied �I told her it had been a shock but not to rule it out�
�That was a bit presumptuous given that I walked out on you�. I answered a little haughtily.
�Rob, I know how men think. That little demon on your shoulder is setting the agenda�. She was right.
�Find out what she wants� I relented.
"I already did. She owes two grand."

It was a hell of a lot of money, but somehow I knew it would be. Suddenly my natural shyness retreated as I realised I was in a position to satisfy a mutual set of needs. This could just become the most exciting thing ever to happen to me.

�Look Lynne, you have to be careful here, how much have you told her?�
�Just what I�ve said already, she wants to hear exactly what you want and how much you�d be prepared to pay�.

�OK, listen to me and I�ll tell you what I�d like to do. It has to be at work in the ladies toilets, and it has to be done using you as a facilitator. The most important thing is that she has to act naturally; as if I�m not there. She�s just going to pee naturally. I want to be inside the cubicle with her, and I want to be allowed a completely free reign to touch, feel and do anything I like without her reacting in any way to my presence. I�m effectively invisible�.

Lynne was smiling �I�m actually enjoying this, - it�s pretty erotic. What if someone�s in there or walks in while you�re there?�
�That�s where you come in. On the chosen day at the right time; when she�s dying for the toilet that is, she signals you to check out the loo to make sure its empty. Lisa goes in and I get your signal to follow her. If anyone comes in I can stand on the seat and in the unlikely event that anyone calls out in conversation, Lisa can reply. No-one will be any the wiser. When the loo is empty you can signal a safe moment to come out. Simple as that. For that I�ll pay off all her debt�.
�What do I get out of it?� she asked, not allowing her very real enjoyment of the situation to be overshadowed by the opportunity for a bit of the action.
�I�ll see you alright� I replied, hoping that I hadn�t misread her intentions. As I said there was no sexual chemistry between us.
�OK � I can only ask� she nodded.
�Oh and Lynne, - no revealing who we�re talking about till we have a deal�.

She drank up and left without another word. I slumped back in the chair and ordered another whiskey.

Nothing happened the following day. I resisted the urge to chase up Lynne for any progress. When I found Lisa behind me at the photocopier, I wondered whether the proposition had been made. It was thrilling to speculate while she stood there, as cool as you like, smiling and chatting to Dave from personnel. For all she knew it could have been him. She had to be wondering if it was.
Being in the position of knowing that she was thinking just that, without giving anything away in either her demeanour or conversation, just sent me into rapture.
I couldn�t match her poise, and stammered at her that I was finished and she could carry on. She ignored me contemptuously and carried on talking.
She was one cool customer.

It was the next day at nine o�clock when the ice broke. �Ping�, an e mail from Lynne. �Tomorrows your lucky day! � it�s a yes; but with conditions. Firstly she wants to know who you are now, and reserves her right to change her mind. Second, you�re to get the cash and give it to me for Maureen to hold till it�s done. If it�s still on, she wants to do it tomorrow afternoon around three o�clock � what do I tell her?�

I still had the chance to abandon this madness but of course I didn�t. I did give it a respectable fifteen minutes before replying.
�OK � go for it�.
Hitting the fateful send key filled my soul with self doubt; what had I done? What if she changed her mind? How would I live with the aftermath?
None of these questions were suppressing the little demon, he was just laughing in my face and I went off alone at lunchtime just to wallow in the thrill of anticipation.

As I returned to work at one thirty, I passed Lynne on the stair. She smiled and gave a little thumbs up.
�You�ve hit the jackpot mate, - she�s definitely up for it�.
I nearly came in my trousers there and then and couldn�t hide my knee trembling reaction.
�You need to pull yourself together for the next twenty four hours� said Lynne, �Try thinking about something else, something more mundane�. She was such a diamond, she had genuine empathy and it crossed my mind that maybe I was missing a sign, was she actually jealous?

As I sat back at my desk, head spinning, and unable to think straight, I opened up my e mail and was knocked sideways when I saw a message from Lisa in the �in box�. I opened it with trepidation.

�Hi Rob, well then. What do we make of this?�
A little attached smiley face put my mind at ease.
�We�ve not spoken but I thought I�d better say hello, and reassure you that I�m really quite flattered to be singled out for your attentions.
From Lynne�s explanation I think I understand where you�re coming from. It�s certainly a bit weird but we all have our little secrets don�t we! Anyway, we won�t be talking about this before or afterwards, it�ll just happen and then we�ll all move on as if it hadn�t, I�m sure that�s the way you want it too.
I hope you get what you want from our little meeting, I know I will. My next problem is explaining to my boyfriend where I suddenly got the cash! � xxx � L.�.
Another smiley face. Oh, she was cool as ice!
I doubled up in ecstasy, and spent the rest of the afternoon thinking of nothing else.

Needless to say, I hardly slept that night. I tossed and turned and watched the clock go round. Adrenalin kept me from feeling any tiredness as I showered and dressed the next morning. I took a bit of extra care and used the best of everything in the bathroom, just to be as well turned out as possible.

As I arrived at work, I nervously looked around for a first glimpse of Lisa.
She was a little late but my panic eased when she burst into the office looking a little flustered.
�Bloody Tube! � Northern Line�s running slow�.
I watched as she threw down her bag and ran off to the ladies on the landing, still in her rain coat. She never so much as glanced up at me.

About ten minutes later, she emerged, much calmer and I drank in her presence, looking over what she had chosen to wear.
Her hair was back to perfect and what little make up she wore was touched up. She was dressed quite professionally with a tight black pencil skirt, vented at the back, with a thin leather belt. Her blouse was crisp and white, open to her cleavage on which a small gold charm sat on a thin neck chain. Her shoes were shiny patent black leather and the height of the heels could only be worn by someone with legs as good as hers.
I tried to see if she was bare legged or wore tights. Tights; but ever so fine and delicate.
I�m sure she saw me staring, after all, she could have expected it, but she certainly never acknowledged it, even for a second.

I actually had to get some work done, but I was inevitably less productive than I might have been. I did try to take my mind off her, if only to make it through the day. I�d never known the hours and minutes pass so slowly.

At long last, after the post lunch activities had settled down and the office was quiet, I had an e mail from Lynne.
�At exactly two thirty I�ll be on the landing outside the door to the ladies. Come out after me and wait on the next landing up, where you can see me through the rails�.

I waited the fifteen minutes and went out at t.... more

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